Saturday, January 29, 2011

Just thought I'd let you know...

Updates are gonna be sporadic over the next couple weeks.

Just got word on Wednesday that we're moving on Monday.

Most everything's packed.  Except for my shirts.

Anyhow, our TV/internet service isn't gonna be brought to our new house until the 10th.

Yeah.  The 10th.

So the only internet access I'll have is at school.  Looking up porn is gonna be hard.  There's only so much room in the bathroom stalls.

Good side to this, however: I can use my no-TV time by either going to the gym or catching up on gialli.


Sunday, January 23, 2011


Working on a scene for my Short Script class.

Then I have to truncate my 10-page treatment to four pages for my new instructor.  It's not due until next week, but I wanna have it done soon.

Because I'm moving in, like, a week.  FML.

I dunno why, but part of me wants to do make Orchid the way Todd Haynes did with Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story.

Google it.  Then tell me I'm fucking nuts.  But I think it would be strangely brilliant.

OK.  Back to my short script.


Sunday, January 16, 2011

Some feedback on Orchid!

Decided to email my old Screenwriting professor regarding my treatment of Orchid with the Petals of Velvet.  I knew my grade, but never did receive any feedback on what worked/what didn't.  And since I was gonna expand this little thriller to 100 pages (give or take), I wanted to hear what he had to say.

Well, I got my response tonight.

He told me to fuck off.

Not really, but that would have been funny.

I'll start with the constructive criticism.

One thing he pointed out was that the treatment had the same main problem as the synopsis: The protagonist.  I've always envisioned the protagonist to be the female lead, Gia.  Her role is a bit more passive, however.  Because the script is a mystery, he feels the protagonist should be the detective investigating the case.  I understand the reasoning, but I would rather try to figure out how to make Gia more active.

The red herring doesn't seen sophisticated enough.  He's a bit underdeveloped, too.  I understand that.  The red herring was a bit of an afterthought when I did the synopsis.

The romantic subplot was also not fleshed out enough.  OK.

One death scene included a slight twist that I enjoyed.  But he pointed something out and I realized I need to tweak it to make it work right.

There isn't a clear moment of "crisis," the moment where the protagonist has to make an important decision that shows their true character.

The ending is a bit weak in his eyes.  Both the killer's explanation of motive and the killer's death.  I like the final moment, but I see his argument.

And the positive:

He's always liked the setting.  It's fresh and intriguing.  I always feel strange when I really sit down and think about how much I know about brothels.

The beginning grabbed his attention.

He refers to one death scene as "grisly, good."  I LOVE that!  I mean, come on.  The dude said GRISLY!  I'd only ever heard that word when I've read descriptions of those 80's slasher movies I loved so much as a kid.

There is an interesting side plot, which I won't divulge because it later fits into the finale.

He loves the identity of the killer, saying he didn't see it coming.

He told me to keep working on it, and that it has promise.


Makes me look forward to expanding this to 100 pages.

Okay.  I gotta go to bed.  I open tomorrow.


Monday, January 10, 2011

A Daunting Task...

Went to my first session of Screenwriting II tonight.  Seems to be a different approach from my previous class.

Ah, well.  All I know is I enjoyed it.

By the end of the semester, we will have a "clean" first draft.

And we'll be using our stories from last semester!

Do y'all know what that means?

By the end of the semester, I will have a full first draft of The Orchid With The Petals Of Velvet!

However, there is one thing that kinda frightens me.

This instructor's Screenwriting I course ended with students completing the first 50 pages.  My old instructor just left us with a ten page outline.

So a bunch of the students are coming in with a half finished script.  I have to start from page one.  However, they didn't have a treatment.  And I have one.

Now I'm worried.  I need, like, a hundred pages by April 15th.

Of all the times to cut the caffeine out of my diet.

At least with the treatment, I know where the story is going.  Maybe that'll help.

Yes, this post is all jumbly.  My brain is all jumbly.

If y'all could just leave a comment along the lines of "You got this!" or "You're gonna rock it,"  I'd really appreciate it.


Monday, January 3, 2011


Check out my other blog: Perro Sexivo: Becoming The Funny Sexy Guy

It's about how I'm gonna finally lose this gut for good and be the sexy bitch on the outside that I am on the inside.

It shows another aspect of me...and will guarantee sexy results...or something...


Saturday, January 1, 2011

So...let's just get this out there...

I sent back Cannibal Holocaust yesterday.

I couldn't go through with it.

What is my penance?